By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
