The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
