he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
