Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much