i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
