Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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