So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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