It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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