Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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