I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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