is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
