I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
be right there i have to get my cape
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
