I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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