The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
