the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looked like the before picture.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize