well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
