Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
His hands were made for my vagina.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
My ATM looks so different sober.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize