we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
