apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
