Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
