We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i want to swaddle you in tequila
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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