forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Less talking, more tequila
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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