i already hear my dad disowning me
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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