Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
This baby is an asshole
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
