She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
