I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize