3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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