Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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