I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize