We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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