Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
