Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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