I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I would fuck him just for his dog
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
we should paint friendship bongs
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