remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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