Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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