What did we do last night that was yellow?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
And the cops told us we were all naked.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize