Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Someone signed my nipple.
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