Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON! http://tfl.nu/qryp
  Replies (19) Good night (1700) Bad night (764)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.

  (1-817): View more from Texas

  OMG. What did u say?

  (817): View more from Texas

  I told her I did too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs. (1-817): OMG. What did u say? (817): I told her I did too. http://tfl.nu/dz5w
  Replies (11) Good night (1345) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma? http://tfl.nu/rtd3
  Replies (4) Good night (617) Bad night (2582)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....

  (614): View more from Ohio

  We've got ourselves a situation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and.... (614): We've got ourselves a situation http://tfl.nu/efwe
  Replies (51) Good night (7309) Bad night (889)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  I've always been the spiritual type.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion. (1-702): I've always been the spiritual type. http://tfl.nu/v0oc
  Replies (27) Good night (7824) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame http://tfl.nu/uj51
  Replies (29) Good night (8030) Bad night (1350)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great. http://tfl.nu/w708
  Replies (8) Good night (2864) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public. http://tfl.nu/i8al
  Replies (10) Good night (1109) Bad night (1951)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out http://tfl.nu/lg4i
  Replies (7) Good night (2260) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally http://tfl.nu/hf6w
  Replies (1) Good night (1741) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur. http://tfl.nu/hsyp
  Replies (7) Good night (763) Bad night (1696)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere http://tfl.nu/5ite
  Replies (4) Good night (1319) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon. http://tfl.nu/r8yq
  Replies (4) Good night (1464) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW! http://tfl.nu/6dh9
  Replies (5) Good night (1088) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship http://tfl.nu/hb2u
  Replies (1) Good night (411) Bad night (154)

Randomize