i permit you to call me
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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