first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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