I can tuck mytits in my pants
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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