Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
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