Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
