got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
