I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I have surprise drugs for everyone
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
