I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
