but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
