I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
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