If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.