you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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