She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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