So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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